Why do some people seem to make it their goal in life to bring grief to the lives of other people? They seem to get enjoyment out of making someone else feel small. They seem to get enjoyment out of making someone else suffer. They seem to thrive on bringing discipline rather than love into another person’s life. They take things that should be joyous and happy and turn them around to bring pain, confusion and sadness.
It seems that no matter how hard you try to be there for and support these type of people they always find a way to shut you down, to turn your world on edge, to make you feel miserable.
Yet somehow this behavior of theirs, even though it’s constantly “in your face” is somehow invisible to others. It is simply not seen by others because it is only done in secret, in the dark…not in public. It’s manipulative and self-serving. It’s vindictive and has the purpose to punish. They exploit other people’s weaknesses. They manipulate and confuse while they covertly seek control. The path of destruction that they leave behind is not noticed at first because even the person they are trying to “destroy” doesn’t realize this is happening to them. It is not human!
We try to explain away the behavior that doesn’t feel right to us by giving them the benefit of the doubt. We say to ourselves “they act this way because they are fearful, wounded themselves, they just need someone to love them”. But the more we feel sorry for them, the more we try to love them or try to explain away their behavior, the more we feel confused, trapped, like there is no way out. The reality of their behavior is that they are ruthless! They are missing the “compassion gene”, they don’t have empathy, they don’t know how to love, they truly don’t even love themselves! The only way of life that they know is to manipulate others to achieve their goals. The only thing they seem to care about is their own happiness, but since they find happiness in manipulating others, it is a warped happiness that is unfulfilled, so they continue to manipulate.
Today I’m sad because I have someone in my life like this. Every time I talk to, interact in some way, or even think about this person they cause pain in my life. I’m at a crossroads…one that I’ve been at before, but somehow keep choosing the path that ends up bringing more pain. Unfortunately, this has gone on so long that at this point no matter which path I choose there will be pain. Why are there people like this and why did one have to come into my life?